Neil Calloway thinks the possibility of a new Power Rangers film is pretty depressing…
With the news we may have another Power Rangers movie solely because the last one shifted a load of cheap plastic manufactured for tiny wages in the developing world to people who should know better, it feels like studios have given up the pretence that films are art and have all but admitted that they’re only made to make a profit for some faceless multinational conglomerate. Coming soon: a sequel made not because they original film demanded that more stories be told, but because everyone who went to see it also bought a giant bucket of a sugary drink at the cinema. At least if that happened we’d know they were being honest.
Screenwriting guru William Goldman calls sequels “whore’s movies”, and while that sounds like the sort of film you’d find on specialist websites, and isn’t always accurate, a sequel made expressly because the first one helped sell action figures is a matter of shame, not pride.
Though music video director Joseph Kahn’s 2015 sex n drugs n that guy from Dawson’s Creek fan film “deboot” Power/Rangers is worth watching, if after three films and countless TV series you still haven’t hit the jackpot critically and financially, it’s probably time to move on and find another franchise to mechanically recover extract every usable piece from.
Relying on toy sales means you make sacrifices when it comes to story; you’re going to want more action set pieces that you can sell toys for rather than something that actually has a plot. It will also change what movies get made; Mattel haven’t licensed a series of La La Land action figures, Hasbro don’t make playsets based on The Revenant. You’ll get films aimed at an increasingly young audience that contain implausible scenes that can be converted into toys rather than advance the plot.
There’s nothing wrong with toy tie ins with films; as a child of the Eighties I cherished my Frank Booth from Blue Velvet action figure, but it’s important that the toys come after the films, not before. Making a movie because it sells toys is not something to be proud of; it’s a sad, cynical act that shouldn’t be shouted about.
Neil Calloway is a pub quiz extraordinaire and Top Gun obsessive. Check back here every Sunday for future instalments.
