Anghus Houvouras on the new Halloween and Hollywood rehashes…
This new Halloween movie. It has triggered something in me. Something that’s been there for a while but just now coming to the surface.
The new Halloween looks garbage. Warm refuse being served to us on a shiny new plate. And many horror and film fans will gleefully eat up this unoriginal, by-the-numbers trash. For some it will go down easy. A quick piece of greasy, uninspired detritus that will pass through you without so much as a second thought. For others it will sit in your stomach and churn bile as you realize you’ve been bilked out of 10 dollars to watch a cheaper, slightly less cooked version of a meal you’ve already enjoyed. This isn’t a meal. It’s a course of scraps that’s been sitting out too long.
People blame the studios for their lack of originality and cry foul about the ridiculous number of reboots and re-imaginings being inserted into the marketplace, but when they pour that hot garbage onto a different plate we lap it up again, like a starved pig at the trough.
Eventually you realize that if someone continues to gladly eat hot garbage, then you can’t blame those pouring it into the dumpster.
This particular rant started erupting in my cerebellum last year when I watched Alien: Covenant, another horrible return to the well that deserves nothing but contempt and ire. It’s an old, terribly told story that continues to burn the fumes of goodwill from a series that saw its peak in the mid 1980’s. We should be embarrassed by Alien: Covenant and the awful storytelling. Its existence should make us cringe. We should be uncomfortable by the amount of times this well has been bled dry.
My nihilistic outlook was somewhat lightened by the complete and utter failure of Solo. For the first time it felt like audience, en masse, were united in their disinterest. For the first time in a while, audiences actively didn’t show up to see something that felt horribly unoriginal. For the first time in ages, ticket buyers decided that they had seen enough of a familiar franchise. It was as if the vast majority of moviegoers collectively shrugged forcing Kathleen Kennedy to freebase Xanax to try and remain calm while Walt Disney’s ghost lingered over her shoulder with a look of stark disapproval.
But once again, I believe some of the blame has to be hoisted on us, the ticket buying public. Or at least those of us who seem interested in dreck like the new Halloween. Or The Predator. Or whatever franchise they’re rebooting with a lazy name change. Do you think there will be any level of improvement to the franchise? Is it going to take you anywhere new or plumb unexplored depths that previous entries in the series hadn’t discovered?
Or, is it going to be a slightly warmed over version of something you’ve already seen? Don’t you hunger for anything new or fresh? Is this plate of reheated garbage really the creative course you want to feast on? Because I’m beginning to believe that you are what you’re eat… so everyone lining up to buy tickets to Halloween… maybe we need to fault those of us so content with these all-too-frequent plates of rubbish for continuing to make the dumpster profitable for Hollywood.
Food for thought.
Anghus Houvouras
Originally published September 7, 2018. Updated September 9, 2018.
