Gasoline Alley, 2022.
Directed by Edward Drake.
Starring Devon Sawa, Bruce Willis, Luke Wilson, Kat Foster, Sufe Bradshaw, Johnny Dowers, Kenny Wormald, Rick Salomon, Terry Curry, Angie Pack, Eric Buarque, Vernon Davis, Steve Eastin, Irina Antonenko, Ash Adams, Chris Cleveland, Mike Dargatis, and Johnny Dowers.
SYNOPSIS:
A man implicated in the triple homicide of three Hollywood starlets begins his own investigation. Needing assistance, he enlists the two detectives on his tail in order to expose a conspiracy more explosive than any of them imagined.
I am somewhat convinced director Edward Drake is a masterful troll. When you think you have seen all the offensively lazy types of performance possible from Bruce Willis (the filmmaker is responsible for both Cosmic Sin and American Siege, a pair of the absolute worst of the action star’s depressing late-career turn), he pops up in Gasoline Alley (not to be confused with Guillermo del Toro’s brilliant psychological thriller Nightmare Alley) as Detective Freeman paired with Luke Wilson’s Detective Vargas. First of all, I have no idea how the hell a reliable talent like Wilson ended up doing this low-effort VOD drivel, but surprising no one, he does most of the investigating and talking during suspect interviews. At the same time, Willis nods along in the same frame and occasionally spouts a line (as if he is being paid by the word for his one day of work on-set).
The detectives are pressing tattoo artist and parlor owner Jimmy Jayne (Devon Sawa, trying to inject some energy into the proceedings). His lighter, which is engraved with “Gasoline Alley,” the name of his tattoo store, was found at a murder scene of dead prostitutes that were aspiring to be Hollywood stars. After being questioned and labeled a person of interest, Jimmy decides to become a detective himself, tracking down anyone in the same circle as Star, one of the dead women he had encountered at the bar the previous night.
This mystery brings Jimmy into contact with many shady characters, although none particularly memorable or exciting. Gasoline Alley is a black void of personality, most evident by my troubles trying to remember who certain characters are while going down the IMDb list, and keep in mind, I’m writing this after finishing watching it. Every character is labeled with one trait (martial arts, aspiring singer, music producer, disgraced actor) and given incredibly bland material to work with. Nearly every dialogue exchange here is filled with dead air and the sensation that nothing is being discussed. Worse, there are so many throwaway scenes involving introduced characters that Gasoline Alley becomes an indecipherable mess of motives.
Sawa tries to give his quest for the truth some desperation and flair (especially during a climactic shootout or whenever brutalizing people for information), but the script (which Drake wrote alongside Tom Sierchio) is lifeless, frustratingly not coming up with anything to say about Hollywood culture, sex trafficking, and homicide. It mixes all these elements as if it will make a more significant point, only to limp along with no tension. To Drake’s credit, he plays around with neon lighting and has two actors turning in decent performances (Sawa and Wilson), but it doesn’t necessarily make any of this tolerable.
While watching Gasoline Alley, many will likely have an idea for the twist. It’s one thing to assume it’s coming, but when it happens, well, the story and film itself become laughably bad. Not that it was any good before, but at the very least, it was believable. If it weren’t the tattoo shop in the movie, I would have assumed the titular gasoline alley was where actors go to set their careers on fire. In the case of Willis, the flames keep spiking higher.
Flickering Myth Rating – Film: ★ / Movie: ★ ★
Robert Kojder is a member of the Chicago Film Critics Association and the Critics Choice Association. He is also the Flickering Myth Reviews Editor. Check here for new reviews, follow my Twitter or Letterboxd, or email me at MetalGearSolid719@gmail.com
