Tony Black with the top five moments from the fourth episode of Game of Thrones season 7…
1 – THE BATTLE OF THE REACH
We haven’t had a final 15 minutes of Game of Thrones this intense probably since ‘Hardhome’ back in Season 5, have we? Though it doesn’t top Battle of the Bastards for sheer epic awesomeness, the Battle of the Reach—in which Dothraki hordes and Dany’s dragons finally let rip on the plains of Westeros—was as phenomenal as seven years of build up hoped for. Some breathtaking sequences, stunning effects and heart in mouth moments where you think about half a dozen characters might be goners, make up for an incredible pay off. Jaime is also a bloody lucky Lannister!
An entire mountain of dragon glass under Dragonstone in itself is a pretty damn cool find, but Jon—playing miner—discovers an extra little treat this week, given the secret, ancient cave filled with ancient murals showing the Long Night, essentially. You know, the mythical ultimate battle between the living & dead that Dany thinks is a load of old toot. Well she may think differently now Jon has given her a tour of arcane history thanks to some cool drawings. Though surely she must have wondered if Jon didn’t draw these himself to help make his point.
3 – CHAOS IS BRAN’S DAGGER
Bran is well on his way to becoming Hal from 2001: A Space Odyssey now, isn’t he? Short of singing ‘Daisy… Daisy…’, he’s pretty much tuned out of the world and onto a new plane of cool time travel powers and visions, but he still has time to give poor Meera the cold shoulder, reunite with Arya and have one of those creepy conversations with Littlefinger, who seems to have found a new Stark to manipulate by giving sinister gifts like daggers. Or has he? If anyone knows Baelish’s game, it’s BranNet, and tell me you weren’t chilled when he finished Petyr’s ‘chaos is a ladder’ moment.
4 – ARYA VS BRIENNE
Yes! Arya made it home! It was touch and go whether she would, especially after her brief encounter with Nymeria, but *finally* Arya gets back to Winterfell and immediately displays how freaking badass she is – firstly by taking the piss out of dumbo guards who ought to be in the Westeros version of Home Alone, then freaking out Sansa by talking about ha ha ha her death list ha ha ha, and finally taking on Brienne—easily the most badass woman in Westeros—and bloody *beating her*. The woman who nearly killed the Hound. If you weren’t scared of Arya before (which you should have been), be afraid now. Be very afraid.
5 – BRONN’S GOLD
Don’t you just love Bronn? Yes he’s a self-aggrandising shit. Yes he doesn’t care what he says or who he says it to. And yes, he’s technically a baddie, but man I was terrified he was going to die here. Especially given he spent much of the beginning talking about his own spoils of war – once the Dothraki attacked, I was sure he was done for. Brilliant idea to pitch the battle around Bronn trying to survive it too. Can he just have the Iron Throne by the end, please?
HONOURABLE MENTION – ‘DICKON’ *SNIGGER*
Lol. You’ve laughed just like Bronn did. Admit it.