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The Crossover Films They Should Make But Probably Won’t

April 3, 2016 by Neil Calloway

Neil Calloway suggests some crossover films that should be made…

Despite mixed reviews, Batman v Superman: The Dawn of Justice had the highest opening weekend for a superhero movie, enough to guarantee another instalment at least. There’s apparently a 21/22/23 Jump Street meets Men in Black movie coming soon. What are the MCU movies if they aren’t huge crossover films? It now looks like instead of being a staple of horror (Freddy vs. Jason) and science fiction(Alien vs. Predator), the crossover film is going mainstream, so here’s a few Hollywood should make but probably won’t.

Indiana Jones goes Back to the Future. Robert Zemeckis closely controls Back to the Future, and won’t allow remakes or all female reboots directed by Paul Feig, but surely he’d allow Back to the Future producer Steven Spielberg to use the characters in a film? It’s not such a stretch that Indy travels in time either; once you’ve survived a nuclear blast by hiding in a fridge, then using a DeLorean to go back in time isn’t that implausible. It opens up the possibilities for bad guys too; you wouldn’t have to rely on Nazis or Communists to supply the threat.

Godzilla Meets Pacific Rim. Guillermo del Toro should just come out and instead of doing a (very good) fan film, should just make it explicit and have the mother of all Pacific beasts fight mechas. It’s the only way to revive the Godzilla movie in the West.

James Bond Meets Mission: Impossible. Two different countries, two spy agencies, they could be allies or they could be enemies. Spectre and Mission: Impossible – Rogue Nation had plots that were almost indistinguishable from each other, so why bother writing two scripts that are exactly the same when you can write one? If Tom Cruise isn’t available, just make it a Bond/Bourne film and get Paul Greengrass to direct.

Star Trek Meets Star Wars. We all know someone who infuriatingly gets Star Wars and Star Trek mixed up, so why not appease them – and annoy everyone else – by combining the two. Yes, before you say “but Star Trek is set in the future and Star Wars is set a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away, but time travel has happened several times in the various Star Trek films and series. Notably when in Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home, released in 1986, the crew of the Enterprise travelled back (rather conveniently, you might say) to 1986. The Enterprise coming up against a Star Destroyer? Or the Falcon? Phasers against Lightsabers?

Jurassic Park meets ET. The US government probably had a sample of ET’s DNA, so what better way to revitalise the fortunes of the problem hit dinosaur attraction than to expand its exhibits to contain aliens? If it’s successful you could throw in a xenomorph or two as a joint venture between InGen and the Weyland-Yutani Corporation. When things get out of control there is only one person who can save the park: Ellen Ripley.

None of these films are going to get made, but rights issues aside, they so easily could; in a world where box office is king, you can expect studio accountants to combine the grosses of different franchises and present them to executives in a bid to squeeze yet more cash out of the public with the next Batman v  Superman.

Neil Calloway is a pub quiz extraordinaire and Top Gun obsessive. Check back here every Sunday for future instalments.

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https://youtu.be/b7Ozs5mj5ao?list=PL18yMRIfoszEaHYNDTy5C-cH9Oa2gN5ng

Originally published April 3, 2016. Updated April 15, 2018.

Filed Under: Articles, Opinions and Long Reads, Movies, Neil Calloway Tagged With: 21 Jump Street, Back to the Future, E.T., Godzilla, Indiana Jones, James Bond, Jurassic Park, men in black, Mission: Impossible, Pacific Rim, Star Trek, Star Wars

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