Anghus Houvouras on why getting upset over The Fantastic Four casting is wasted energy….
The internet is a fun, if often irrational place. We (and by ‘we’ I mean internet movie sites) spend so much time speculating wildly about everything revolving around geek movies and comic book adaptations (myself included). Then when announcement are finally made, we spend even more time complaining about those choices. I can’t even fathom the amount of energy dispensed writing angry diatribes about Ben Affleck being cast as Batman or Jesse Eisenberg as Lex Luthor.
Imagine what we could do if we could harness that energy. If there was a way to convert geek rage into energy we could no doubt solve the Earth’s energy crisis in a matter of minutes. There is nothing as plentiful and renewable as fanboy indignation. Trolling could become a major power source. Thermal units could be measured in ‘Afflecks’. Every time a geek movie announces the casting, fuel hits fire.
Yesterday we learned that 20th Century Fox was making offers to the cast of their new Fantastic Four movie. Miles Teller, Jamie Bell, Kate Mara (meow), and Michael Jordan. Immediately the internet cried out making sure everyone knew how displeased they were with the casting. I was a little upset too, mainly over the casting of Michael Jordan as the Human Torch. And I think everyone knows why: Was he really that good in Space Jam? I mean, the guy is pushing 60 and hasn’t done a movie in decades. Sure, he’s physically fit and still a recognizable icon, but is a retired basketball player and Hanes spokesman really the right choice for The Fantastic Four?
Wait. It’s not THAT Michael Jordan? Then I suppose I have no gripes about the choices for the new Fantastic Four.
There’s part of me that understands the disappointment in casting choices for your favorite superheroes. I myself have written columns about why I’d like to see Karl Urban play Batman or Christoph Waltz play Lex Luthor. There’s been some fun (albeit heated) discussions around what actor feels ‘right’ for the role. This makes sense when you’re talking about Superman or Batman. Characters that have been well treated cinematically and have been portrayed with varying degrees of quality. When it comes to characters like Superman, Batman, or Lex Luthor we have had admirable cinematic portrayals whereas the Fantastic Four has not.
I can’t fathom why anyone is remotely concerned about the Fantastic Four casting choices. They can’t possibly be worse than the Roger Corman produced snicker-fest or Tim Story’s two putrid installments. Seriously guys, could the bar be any lower? There is nowhere to go but up. Even if the film is painfully average, it will still be light years ahead of what we’ve gotten before. The film could be a total disaster and it would probably still be more watchable than Rise of the Silver Surfer.
I think a lot of the restlessness about the casting comes from the youth-ification of the cast. It’s the same kind of knee-jerk reaction over the Eisenberg casting. “He’s too young!” they say. “He doesn’t fit the image of the character I have from reading comics!” It’s that fanboy entitlement iIve discussed at great length. People have an idea of what the character should be. When someone is cast outside that fanboy comfort zone, the bile begins to churn and a million tweets are produced.
All of it seems so pointless when it comes to the Fantastic Four. We’ve yet to have a good adaptation of these classic characters. 20th Century Fox has proven their inability or interest in adapting these characters faithfully. Your confidence has been appropriately beaten into submission after handing the franchise to Tim Story. I mean, they handed the reigns over to the guy who did Barbershop. That is a level of institutional ineptitude that few studios ever achieve.
I find it difficult to muster any emotion into the casting announcement. It’s not like we’re replacing Robert Downey Jr. with Kellan Lutz. Was Jessica Alba so iconic in the role of the Invisible Woman that Kate Mara feels like a downgrade? Do you have so many fond memories of Ioan Gruffudd’s awkward take on Reed Richards that Miles Teller feels like an insult? Your only two options are ‘go with it’ or ‘rage’. Based on what history has taught me, I have absolutely zero faith that Fox is going to deliver a great Fantastic Four movie. But it can’t be possibly be worse than what came before.
That my friends is the only sliver of hope we have.
Anghus Houvouras is a North Carolina based writer and filmmaker. His latest work, the novel My Career Suicide Note, is available from Amazon.
Originally published February 21, 2014. Updated April 11, 2018.
