Your driving license has been revoked. It’s time to take a journey on public transport, but pray it’s not a nightmare like these journeys from hell…
We’ve all been there: public transport. You’re stuffed into a bus, a train, a plane, and there’s a mofo who smells, and if you don’t smell one, it’s probably you. One of the great joys about learning to drive and having your own car, despite the environmental impact, is being in full control of the wheel, the tunes, and the odours (unless you have a kid who’s full of beans in the back seat). Sure, now and again we can experience a pleasant train journey that’s peaceful or provides ample time to work on your laptop, but odds are, everyone has had a horrible journey on public transport.
Screenwriters have also noticed the dramatic potential in a horrible journey on public transport, from true-life adaptations to made-up stories. Hijackings, mismatched pairings stuck together, or high-concept thrillers, we’ve seen it all on screen. Here are ten essential nightmare journeys on public transport….
Planes, Trains and Automobiles
We’ll start things off light with an all-time classic about the perils of public transport seating roulette. On a full plane/train/whatever, you may find yourself sat next to someone inoffensive; you might find yourself next to someone gorgeous (if you’re sat beside me, obviously), but there’s also the flip side, and you could be placed next to a pain in the ass. For Neil Page, Steve Martin’s stuck-up businessman, it comes in the form of Del, “the shower-ring curtain guy,” played brilliantly by John Candy.
For good measure, this has a host of transport nightmares, starting with a plane journey that gets diverted way off course, before journeys on a bus, a train, and even a meat wagon, a rental car, and more. Of course, as the film progresses, the mismatched pair have to join together, but Del is becoming more attached to Neil, despite his aloof demeanour. It ends on an emotional high, but the journey to get there is hilarious. There are few better movies to watch once you hit the Thanksgiving and festive season. Perfection.
Under Siege 2: Dark Territory
Imagine being an international terrorist just trying to have a nice, relaxing cross-country train journey. Imagine being another passenger too, or Katherine Heigl, and then Steven Seagal enters the carriage with his gloomy expression, and you know he’s going to break necks indiscriminately and spoil the atmos of the journey.
Following the success of Under Siege, a sequel to Seagal’s biggest money spinner to date, was inevitable. Likewise, the disastrous performance and reception of his directorial debut and indulgence eco-warrior action film, On Deadly Ground, also meant Seagal had to go back to a safe choice to prevent his career from imploding. It half-worked, with diminishing but not terrible returns. Under Siege 2 isn’t a patch on the first film, but it’s kind of fun, and honestly, you can’t help but root for the bad guys (particularly as the production itself must have been a journey from hell wrangling Seagal).
Non-Stop
Liam Neeson is no stranger to eventful journeys. In The Grey, a plane crash led him to fend off wolves in the Alaskan wilderness, whilst a train journey in The Commuter also proved dangerous. He’s also had trouble (twice) on Ice Roads. Then there’s Non-Stop, where Neeson plays an alcoholic air marshal whose flight gets quietly taken over by a terrorist hidden within the passenger roster, who manages to make Neeson look like the man behind it all.
It’s a classic slice of Neeson and Jaume Collet-Serra collaboration that ticks their usual team-up boxes. It’s a nice slow burn filled with growing intrigue and pays off with plenty of (albeit always ludicrous) twists. This was Neeson at the top of his action renaissance game.
Titanic
The Titanic’s first and final voyage is one of the biggest disasters in history. James Cameron decided to bring that cursed voyage to the big screen, focusing on the fictional love story between a young woman from a wealthy family and a lowly artist who sneaks aboard the ship. Of course, we already know the inevitable outcome going into the movie: the huge ship runs into an iceberg.
If the love story itself is effectively rote, the technical wizardry that realizes the historic fate of the sinking ship is still near unmatched. James Cameron, before becoming obsessed with entirely CGI-created blue Alien worlds, delivered a perfect marriage of impeccable CG with stunning practical work on a grand scale. It might be maudlin, but it’s got heart, so by the time the ship is sinking, we’re invested in the two leads.
Collateral
What about the humble driver of public transportation? For Max (Jamie Foxx), his nightly cab shift turns into a deadly game of cat and mouse when he unwittingly picks up a hitman who looks like Tom Cruise with grey hair.
Michael Mann shifted his visuals into the realm of early 00’s digital cameras to create a gritty, rough-and-ready look that effectively brought LA nights to life as we’d rarely seen. The film rockets along with Mann’s watertight direction and feels like he’s riffing more than with the more meticulous approach in films like Heat and The Insider. Cruise, in a rare antagonist role, is superb.
Snowpiercer
Ever been stuck on a British train that’s at a standstill? It could be leaves on the tracks or hot weather frazzling the engines. Now you’re trapped in a tin can, and some douchebag is eating a stinkin’ Tuna sandwich (me, sorry about that). It might sound horrible, but what if that train journey was a never-ending perpetual loop because the outside world was now uninhabitable? Granted, if you’re passing through Slough, you’re not far off, but in Snowpiercer it’s the backdrop for a dystopian nightmare that Bong Joon-ho brings brilliantly to life.
The train itself is a perfect microcosm of social structure, with the poverty-stricken dregs in the back of the train, kept apart from the upper-class passengers toward the front. Inevitably, there will be a revolution, and that’s led by Chris Evans. Like many films almost entirely locked within a single setting, it’s always imperative to keep the story interesting and well-paced, and Joon-ho is on top of his game here. Likewise, he orchestrates some nice set pieces in the confines of the train.
Snakes on a Plane
No one wants their plane hijacked, and no one wants their plane taken over by a bunch of snakes. Sadly for Samuel L. Jackson, that’s exactly what happens, and by the end of the film he’s had it with them.
The film is now 20 years old but was a surprise hit thanks to memorable soundbites, the crazy concept, and the prestige of having Sam Jackson as the lead. It’s elevated well above the likes of similar-themed films Asylum might produce, and it’s still ‘massessssss’ of fun.
Speed
If you’ve ever been on a bus going up and down the hills and winding corners of High Wycombe, you’ll know it’s a thrill-a-minute of near-tipping turns and maniacal driving. It’s almost like not dropping below 50mph becomes a personal mission. However, for Sandra Bullock in Speed, dropping below 50 mph in the bus she has to take the wheel of, will result in being blown to smithereens.
Keanu Reeves leaps aboard it to try and find a way to rescue the passengers trapped inside. Meanwhile, Dennis Hopper is the disgruntled bomb expert with his finger on the trigger. Speed still holds up as one of the best action films of the 90s, filled with tension, stellar set pieces, and a brilliant cast. Keanu and Sandra are brilliant together, and Hopper is a great bad guy.
Train to Busan
A train journey beset by Steven Seagal, or a plane full of snakes. Whatever your public transport disaster, few come as immediately terrifying as having to escape hordes of zombies, only to have them infiltrate the train you hoped would lead you to salvation.
Sang-ho Yeon delivered one of the freshest, most exciting zombie films of recent cinema history. Train to Busan is brimming with threat and tension but also strikes with powerful emotional payoffs. A hearty Tuna sandwich probably would have repelled the zombies, but it’s a bit late now. The film has a fantastic final punch to the heart, too. The follow-ups have sadly not stood up to comparison.
Red Eye
Wes Craven often proved himself more flexible than many appreciated. He made iconic horror in a variety of tones, including brilliantly subversive, or, in the case of A New Nightmare, way ahead of the curve in Meta cinema. He could also conjure up a good old-fashioned and rollicking tense thriller.
Red Eye pits Rachel McAdams against a deranged terrorist sitting beside her. She’s been specifically targeted and is trapped aboard the red-eye flight, tasked with facilitating an assassination. Craven manages to keep that tension simmering nicely within the claustrophobic plane setting. Then there’s Cillian Murphy at the booming point of his rising fame, channeling his inner maniac brilliantly.
What’s your favourite film set on public transport? Let us know on our social channels @FlickeringMyth…
Tom Jolliffe
